Every parent goes through cycles during the 18 years when they're raising a precious child. There are good days and bad days; times when you wish you'd had more kids and other times when you're frustrated, tired and impatient with the child or children you do have. That's all part of the parenting experience.
But I hope you'll take a moment to do what I try to do each January 1st and that is resolve to be a better parent. Be as specific as you can in the areas you want to improve and take it one day at a time. If your child is old enough, you can even discuss your thoughts with them and ask them to make their own list of resolutions, including some that say they'll try to be a better child.
At the very least, it lets them know that you love them more than ever, that they're a priority to you, and that you are doing the best you can. Just as important, it lets them know that you're not perfect and that even the parent they love and look up to makes mistakes and has room for improvement. That concept gives your child the breathing room they need to accept their own mistakes and imperfections and try a little harder each day.
For 2010, my parenting resolutions might include something like this:
- I resolve to wake myself and my son up 15 minutes earlier every weekday so we don't feel rushed getting him to school.
- I resolve to be more creative with dinner options and even to enlist Jake's suggestions and help preparing meals.
- I resolve to tickle Jake more and not try to kiss him so much (he's at that stage where there's a lot of "Mom, you already kissed me 3 times today…that's enough!")
- I resolve to make a silly face when I'm getting frustrated with him to try to diffuse the tension.
- I resolve to let Jake pick out his own sneakers and clothes, even though I could do the clothes shopping in half the time (he's also at the stage where he's starting to vogue in front of the mirror. Ugh.)
- I resolve to learn to play Wii sports resort with Jake and to use the Wii fitness board at least once a week with him in a fun competition so that we both get exercise.
- I resolve to keep even more fruits and veggies around so we eat healthier snacks.
- I resolve to be more patient with Jake's stall and delay tactics on reading and homework assignments.
- I resolve to buy a fondue pot and have fun with Jake getting the kitchen messy!
As a parent of a wonderful, active 9-year-old I feel so lucky to have had great times with Jake. But I have room for improvement, as we all do. I hope you'll dive in and make a self-help list that will bring more smiles to the dinner table each night!
Happy New Year everyone.
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