Its also become a big challenge in my home as well.
My 8 year-old has become very adept at picking and choosing when to listen to his parents (or teacher) and when not to.
If you're finding that you need to repeat requests or raise your voice to get your child's attention, welcome to the club.
As with most behavioral issues with children, poor listening skills means parents are sending out the wrong messages--or maybe mixed messages. Somewhere along the way, my kid realized that not listening or misbehaving could either get him what he wants, or avoid doing something he didn't want to do.
What I've learned is that I had been sending out the wrong signals--but not anymore.
Here are some tips i've come across that will help promote your child's positive listening skills.
1. Use direct requests. For example "please pick-up your toys" works better than "can you pick-up your toys?" because in most cases the answer will be no.
2.Be specific. If you tell your child what you want to see and the time frame you want to see it, there's less room for non-compliance. For example, saying "please clean off the table right now" is better than simply saying "its time to clean-up."
3. Remain calm but firm. Even adults have difficulty learning or doing something when they're being yelled at.
4. Make eye contact. I've found that yelling a command across the room, while he's watching t.v. Isn't as effective as speaking directly to your child. One expert even recommends having your child repeat your request back to you.
5. Follow through. When he or she does what you ask, immediately provide praise or positive attention. That quick response is important because young children have a poor concept of time, and the longer you wait to react to the behavior, the less effective it will be.
Above all, its up to parents to be predictable and consistent when managing your child's behavior. With time their listening skills will hopefully improve.
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