But law enforcement officials we talked to maintain for police officers there is no time in a crisis for such thoughts.
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John Fetzer is the chief warrant officer of the Camden County Sheriff's SERT team.
He told us in his 25 years as a SWAT officer he has never thought about his mortality.
He says weekly training dealing with armed threats keeps officers focused when facing actual shooters. The goal to train using basic maneuvers until everyone on the team is proficient and work together which allows them to correctly react when facing an actual threat.
Before he was FOP President, John McNesby was a Philadelphia narcotics officer. He is familiar with serving warrants on suspected drug houses.
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He too argues training is the key.
"Listen you can never really plan for wrongdoing, you just have to react and hope your training kicks in," he said.
He added it's important to have "the backs of fellow officers." He said that is exactly what happened yesterday.