After all, you become a parental expert simply by becoming a parent!
We made a plea on social networking site Facebook to get ideas for our latest topic.
Angela Sposato-Mento suggested: "Teaching them about safety and not to trust everyone without scaring them."
So "stranger danger" it is. A topic that should be tops for any parent, right?
Angela brings up a good point. How do you balance between a child's fear and respect regarding strangers? Some strangers may actually be people who live in your neighborhood, or relatives you haven't see in a while, or people of authority like police officers and local office holders. They shouldn't be taught to immediately start screaming and run away when encountering these people, right (provided you are with your child during these times)?
And then there are the strangers you want your children to stay clear of: those who seek contact with young children when they have no business to do so.
What should you do? Here is some advice from our parenting helpers on Facebook:
Amy Kelinbach Derstine of Green Lane, PA says: "This past fall I started letting my 11-year-old go to our neighborhood playground without me. I still don't like it, but I can't hide her away forever. During a "stranger danger" presentation while she was in Brownies, they told the kids if they're ever approached they should run in the opposite direction of the car. The stranger will not get out of their car to take the child and it is unlikely that they would turn the car around for them."
Good advice. It seems potential predators always look for an easy victim, not a chase.
Courtney Winkler, an alumna of West Chester University: "The basic safety rules of Say No, Get Away, and Tell Someone are really easy for kids to remember, and good to use in any situation where they feel that something's not right. Teach kids to trust their 'uh-oh feeling' both with strangers and people that they know."
That "uh-oh" feeling can be really handy in a variety of situations throughout life. It's a great idea to try to start sharpening it when they are young.
Valerie Deininger of Marlton, New Jersey says: "My children wave 'hi' to complete strangers while in the car. When we are out they try to talk to everyone and anyone. I try to stop it before it happens. It's not that I'm trying to be mean, but the most 'normal' looking person could be someone you don't expect."
This would be a good spot to include a Facebook comment made by Stacy Nally-Aguilar of Turnersville, New Jersey, who says most child molestation victims know their attackers.
Indeed, Stacy is right. Studies have shown that the majority of child sexual assaults do occur between a child and someone the child already knows. Again, the predator is looking for an easy victim, a child who trusts in him/her.
The study we have linked here says only 13 percent of child molestations involved strangers. The internet document is worth a look.
Kim Altman Pennock of Manalapan, New Jersey has a great idea she uses with her son: "I also practice with him often. His phone number and address were the first things he learned. He also knows not to be tempted by animals or toys that may be offered to him. Oh, and go Blue Hens.:)"
Yes, Kim, go Hens! (We are graduates of the University of Delaware.)
And finally, Pamela Regensburger Masciotro suggests everyone watches "The Safe Side" by America's Most Wanted host John Walsh, who as you know lost his son Adam to a child predator. Here is a link with more information.
Thanks so much to our friends at Facebook for helping us with this super-interactive edition of our Parenting Blog. And remember,you can always join in the conversation on my Facebook page.
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