Yep, I'm keeping lists, just like Santa Claus. As I was taping them to the inside of our kitchen cabinet, my son Luke was bawling and pleading with me to take them down. But, I explained, every time Luke or Emma did something naughty I, or my husband or babysitter, would write it on the list. The same goes for acts of kindness.
Then, when it's time to decide if we should go to a fun activity or consider some kind of privilege, we will check the list and see who deserves it.
My list idea came after a day of Luke acting up and testing me. He would do something to make his little sister, Emma, cry (something he has perfected.) Then, when I took a toy away or put him in time out, he would argue with me about it. He's a smart boy, but very strong-willed. It was time for me to set some limits.
The National Association of School Psychologists writes: "Limits can help children feel that the world is orderly, predictable and safe. Parents should consider the child's age and development when setting limits. Limits should be enforced consistently, and there should be clear and appropriate consequences when those limits are challenged."
I learned a list was a great visual way to show Luke that his behavior has consequences. Once Luke could see that written record, his attitude immediately changed. As we review the lists each evening, Luke takes pride on watching the "nice" list get longer and promises not to repeat the items on the "naughty list."
Happy parenting! Cecily
Read more Parenting Perspective blogs by visiting the Parenting Channel on 6abc.com.
